If you remember anything from 40 Early Mornings, let it be these three words:

No. Big. Deal.

No Big Deal is one of the five qualities Pema Chödrön tells us that meditation practice helps us cultivate.

Notice that this is a very, very different reframing of meditation as a practice to help us “accomplish goals.

The other qualities we cultivate are: steadfastness, clear seeing, courage, and attention. They are, of course, all connected and intertwined, but No Big Deal is perhaps my favorite, because — let’s face it — we live in a society where are a lot of small deals are made to be BIG FUCKING DEALS. You only have to think about the notifications pinging on your phone right now, every message that fills your inbox, the pressure of your year-end quarterly sales goals, or gosh darn-it, the way the grocery store credit card machine beeps loudly and frantically at you to REMOVE YOUR CARD (right after they warned you to absolutely NOT remove your card).

You catch my drift.

It’s a simple and quiet REVOLUTION to practice No Big Deal.

Here’s what Pema has to say about No Big Deal (and this is from her book How to Meditate: A Practical Guide to Making Friends with your Mind, and it’s as brilliant and simple and kind as you’d imagine):

The fifth and last quality regarding why we meditate is what I call “no big deal.” It’s what I am getting at when I say we become flexible to the present moment. Yes, with meditation you may experience profound insight, or the magnificent feeling of grace or blessing, or the feeling of transformation and newfound courage, but then: no big deal. You’re on your deathbed, and you have this nurse who’s driving you nuts, and it’s funny: no big deal.

This was one of the biggest teachings from my teacher, Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche: no big deal. I remember one time going to him with what I thought was a very powerful experience from my practice. I was all excited, and as I was telling him about this experience, he had a look. It was a kind of indescribable look, a very open look. You couldn’t call it compassionate or judgmental or anything. And as I was telling him about this, he touched my hand and said, “No . . . big . . . deal.” He wasn’t saying “bad,” and he wasn’t saying “good.” He was saying that these things happen and they can transform your life, but at the same time don’t make too big a deal of them, because that leads to arrogance and pride, or a sense of specialness. On the other hand, making too big a deal about your difficulties takes you in the other direction; it takes you into poverty, self-denigration, and a low opinion of yourself. So meditation helps us cultivate this feeling of no big deal, not as a cynical statement, but as a statement of humor and flexibility. You’ve seen it all, and seeing it all allows you to love it all.

No big deal,
Cath ;)

Meditation: The Loving-Kindness Meditation. Do your best. Let it be enough.

Reflection: What’s something that’s probably actually “No Big Deal” but you treat it / it feels like a BIG FUCKING DEAL? What would happen if you could treat it like No Big Deal? What might that mean for you?